Isn’t that a beautiful quote?
The other day I felt like I’d received some earth shaking news. We received an e-mail and I immediately went outside where Tyler was welding a wood burning stove for a missionary and just blurted (yes, I’m very tactful sometime) the bad news we’d just received via e-mail. It was financial. So, in our experience being on the field for over 3 years now we have had an average of one big financial trial a year that has kept us from being able to save or get ahead. Big set backs out of our control.
After going through those trials, which felt like dark pits of despair to me because I’m kind of a dramatic person, I thought we were done. I thought we had passed God’s test. Sigh of hopeful relief! Approved…graduating and moving on in the world of trials. I thought that God after allowing us to go through so much financial strain would certainly now bless us! I mean we even sold our large all-terrain 1995 Nissan Patrol SUV back in January so that we could get out from under a loan we had to take out after Tyler was in an accident totaling our 1986 Samuria. Buying a vehicle down here is like purchasing a house! Maybe not quite, but close. Because we’re a land locked country and there is a huge con going on with the government and vehicle import taxes. Even the 95 patrol, which is older for sure, was selling for 13,000. It’s really sickening how much you have to pay for “old and falling apart” down here. We downsized to a 4 passenger 2 door Suzuki Samuria so that we could be finally on our way to being financially free and from being a debtor to anyone. It was a great move!
God was so wise when He said, in my own paraphrased words, that the man who owes money is not only a debtor ,but like a slave to the lender. That is exactly how it feels to me to have debt. Any debt at all.
Now my initial reaction to this trial was shock. Not little shock but big big SHOCK. Tyler didn’t really want to talk about it right then. I don’t blame him. Something that I’m still learning, probably because I’m such a slow learner is that sometimes it’s a really healthy thing to just step away from the problem. Pray and give it over to God’s control. Let the shock wear off. Pray some more…a lot more. And just see how God will work out a solution for us.
So, I called my mom. I remember telling her that I just don’t understand why God is giving us another one of these trials. Why? Does He want us to forever struggle? Doesn’t He want what is best for us? Because sometimes I wonder…I mean we don’t do anything shady when it comes to finances…no compromises. I’m so grateful Tyler didn’t let me talk too much about it right then. He knew I needed time too. And he knew the only response possible for us. We knew what the only rational response for a child of God should be when faced with something we do not know how to respond to. It has become second nature to so many people to just be able to honestly give the impossible over to God to watch Him make the impossible possible. I feel like I was 2 short conversations from this.Maybe someday I’ll be able to do this right off the bat… maybe next time? That was Thursday’s trial.
Friday came and we knew we needed to do something about it, but I knew Tyler wasn’t going to be able to get to it until Monday since he was busy preparing for Sunday service. So, we waited and prayed. Sunday evening before church we even went and window shopped at a lot for sale that we knew would be impossible for us especially if we had to pay out this large sum. We looked anyways and just had faith that God was going to work this trial out. Somehow. He would. And by noon Monday that sum was cut in half!! I know it was God. I know.
I have so much more to write about what we’ve been learning in our ministry here the last few months, but that will wait for another post. Just let me say that when we go through trials if we would just learn to immediately give it over and surrender even the fear and anxiety to God’s control I think trials may begin to not seem like such insurmountable waves to overcome. Because God knows the end of everything. He’s at work in ways we can not understand. Yet, He takes the time to stop… and listen… and take care of His children.
“ casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7